First Light

in dark nights 5, originally uploaded by davidericfoaney.

I ain’t been nowhere I wanna go
And it makes me crazy.
Something in me get evil when I hear somebody
Done gone there
And got the nerve to tell me about it.
Face freeze up, my eyes cut and my feet start arguing.

Walk away, nigger…

but I don’t.

I just stay and watch his face and listen to him tell me
Where he been and and where else he wanna go.
My feet continue to bicker with me.

Walk away.
This ain’t yours.
You know that.

But how come it can’t? Why the fuck not?
Instead I nurse loss.

Bite down on it.
Blood come softly.

Filled my mouth, warm.

I lick his teeth and tongue.
Stop it.

Stop the noise is all I want to do.
Spit each word back into his mouth.
Stop.

Shut him up. Gag him.
Coat his throat. His memory of me. Of it.
Want him to taste the blood.
Memorize its sweetness.

Still, he talking. Not stopping. Laughing even.
No room for my words.
They limp sitting on a bench somewhere
In the dark.
Balloon holding.
Keeping watch for mama.
But fingers can’t reach through to that side.
Yet.

Words wait.
Shuffle their feet.
Waiting.
For first light.

Walk away.

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